In this week’s Mindset Moment, we looked at the story of the Fennville Blackhawks and how they rallied for a district basketball championship after one of their star players died the previous week. I wrote about their resolve and willingness to move forward, deal with the grief, and seize life. Out of that brief post came a question that I want to try and answer here.
"I’m wondering PJ how you can tell the difference between moving through adversity with strength and moving on without having dealt with the grief?"
The answer seems simple enough, but it requires the highest honesty with ourselves. Moving through adversity with strength is distinguished by the marks of Purpose, Gratitude, and Forgiveness. Moving on without having dealt with the grief is marked by the noted absence of those three Elements of Personal Choice.
When dealing with adversity in a healthy way, we aren’t afraid of the thoughts of the adversity. The death of a loved one, the loss of a relationship, or being fired from a job are all traumatic events that can bring heavy emotions. If we maintain or regain our sense of Purpose, we can embrace the emotions and see our way through. Gratitude shows up in our willingness to take the good from the situation and choose it over the bad.
This is important!
A very dear friend of mine lost his 18 year old daughter in a car accident. I'm struck by the magnitude of this situation. I can't begin to understand the trauma and angst he and his family must feel right now. Ironically enough, this post was in my inbox. I thought I'd pass this on to those who have to deal with grief. Let us all remember the frailty of life. God bless you, my friend. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
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